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CONTENTS
Pros and cons of getting old
Acknowledgements
Preface
Introduction
Chapter 1. Better for me?
Chapter 2. Better for my family and friends?
Chapter 3. Better for everyone else?
Chapter 4. Why is it so hard?
Chapter 5. Why does stuff die?
Chapter 6. Right or privilege?
Chapter 7. How can a Boomer prepare?
Chapter 8. Why & how do Boomers do it?
References
Index
About the book
At some point in our lives we all have to face the fact that we are not immortal, that the Grim Reaper is waiting in the wings. He always gets us in the end, but we usually have a little time to prepare, a little time to adjust to the inevitable. This book by Dr. Brownell is meant to be a guide to better deal with the issues that confront us as the Reaper closes in.
Fortunately, getting old isn’t all bad. This excerpt from the Baby Boomers’ Guide to the Afterlife summarizes the principal pros and cons:
PROS AND CONS OF GETTING OLD
First the pros…
Meatloaf, rare Medicare Discount fare Rocking chair
Solitaire Laissez faire Folks don’t care what you wear
Now the cons…
Trick knees Heart disease Ill at ease Where’s my keys?
Glaucoma Lymphoma Melanoma Persistent coma
Hysterectomy Radical mastectomy Take that pill rectally
Asphyxia Dyslexia Anorexia Dyspepsia
Diarrhea Emphysema Gotta find a panacea
Failing vision Can’t hardly see I accidentally drank my pee
Unpaid loans Handicap zones Kidney stones Moans and groans
Embarrassing fits Ugly zits Droopy tits Call it quits
Bad mood Decrepitude Tasteless food The nurse is rude
Stand in line Curved spine Mental decline Not a good sign
Took a fall Can’t hardly crawl Way too much cholesterol
Bad circulation Defibrillation Irradiation No explanation
Blue hair Bath chair Can’t get air They don’t care
Went to probate Forced to arbitrate Had to liquidate Lost the estate
Urinalysis Paralysis Callouses Dialysis
Pancreatitis Tonsillitis Gastritis Dermatitis
Cirrhosis Halitosis And osteo porosis
Hypertension Need more pension Total lack of comprehension
Elimination Dehydration Macular degeneration
Memory loss White sauce No teeth for dental floss
Bad complexion Graft rejection Chronic yeast infection
Need carbohydrate But I’m overweight Would appreciate what the others ate
Worn out livers Recurring shivers What happened to my care givers?
Palpitations Aggravations Why’ve I got hallucinations?
